I Hate Riding Horses in Video Games

I also have a personal grudge against horses just like, in general, but whatever.

Ever since Elder Scrolls: Oblivion, I have had a strong dislike of riding horses. Horses genuinely suck ass in games. You would think riding across the countryside would make things go faster, and I mean sure it does, but also you probably missing so much stuff. Like flying past a hidden cave entrance, or just picking up that damn collectible or rock on the ground for crafting.

Side Note: Have we forgotten about the infamous horse armor? I haven’t.

Horses are a burden. Thinking of Red Dead Redemption 2, your horse is probably the worst part of that game. I hate that I have to brush it, clean it, and that it gets tired. And you have no choice in this. You have to take care of this giant beast because its the only way you can make any sort of progress in that game.

This rant really rose up while playing Ghost of Tsushima lately. This game is pretty big, and to really feel like you’re making any progress at all in a timely matter, you gotta ride this four legged monster. Coupled with the bad control scheme and how annoying just like turning around in the game is while riding Midnight Shadow or whatever, it makes me rather just run around instead.

Assassin’s Creed Odyssey is another game lately that makes me just want to run around on my own two legs. Especially when you’re trying to grab rocks on the ground or sticks or whatever for crafting junk. You miss it everytime. Every. Time. At least my horse in that game is a bad ass unicorn.

Maybe it’s just my personal bias, but let’s get horses out of video games for a while. Let me ride a giant wolf, or like, a pig or something. I’m sure the same issues will arise with whatever animal mount I’m riding, but at least it’s not a horse.

Side Note: I’m annoyed I had to download so many pictures of video game horses to my phone to write this post.

4 thoughts on “I Hate Riding Horses in Video Games

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  1. Yes, it sucks so much. Why is it that when you whistle for your horse it runs up behind you and you have to scramble to find it? Why wouldn’t the character automatically mount it? Obviously if I’m calling for my horse it is because I want to get on it. And the pause that happens in every game before the horse vaults some object. It is clunky as. I really have to consider carefully whether I want to buy a game if it has a bloody horse in it. The exception is The Last of Us 2. The horse riding in that is OK, probably because it isn’t an open world.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I wrote this a while ago but it’s still super true. Even playing Valhalla calling your horse is a pain. But I have found one game that has made riding a horse actually the better experience I’ve had in a game.

      Elden Ring.

      You call that spectral horse and it just spawns right underneath you and you’re off to the races. The best use of a horse in any game I’ve played so far. And it double jumps? Amazing.

      Still don’t like real video game horses or real-life horses for that matter, but Torrent is alright in my book.

      Like

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